Archive for Writing
I came across this article, Dating Irish girls – A guide for American lads, and thought it handy if you’re a dude, but what about us ladies? It’s a bit of a pointless read unless you’re trying to bag an Irish girl. So I thought I’d help you out a bit from my personal and current experiences and whip up this little guide for you.
1. Learn to love carbs, especially spuds
As a personal rule of thumb, I try to avoid complex carbs. They don’t do me any favors when I step on the scale. But if you’re going to date an Irishman, you’ll need to concede every now and then. Irish boys live off spuds, pasta, and bread.
If you can’t bare to give in all the time (like moi), then you’ll have to find a way for him to have his spuds and you not starve. I usually opt for modified, healthier options. Things YOU have to prepare for, because he may not understand why you don’t want spuds 24/7.
2. Drink at your own pace
It’s simple; he probably started drinking when he was 13 and knew how to pour a proper pint a week later. He also likely worked in a pub, so don’t think you can keep up. No one wants to be that girl, so just be you. Yes, I speak from personal experience.
3. Irish lads are NOT from the UK
Do your homework. The Republic of Ireland (Northern Ireland not included) is not in the UK. The English are not the same as the Irish, just as the Scottish are not the same as the Welsh. If you refer to that part of the world, it’s the UK and Ireland, not just the UK.
4. Learn some slang
You don’t have to know every slang word being said, but learn a few. It’ll make the conversation a lot easier. I promise.
Also, don’t be offended by their slang words. While you may choose to not use words like ‘cunt’ or ‘fuck’, it’s pretty much a part of their vocabulary. Same way we say ‘Awesome’…a lot. And if it really does bother you, see rule #5.
5. Grow thick skin
Even if your BF is super lovey dovey to you and knows better than to ever ‘take the piss’ (see rule #4), you’re still fair game for his friends. Learn how to take a joke, don’t be sensitive, and know how to give it back. You’re going to have more fun when you’re in on the joke, instead of being the joke.
6. Irish lads don’t “date”
Maybe this should have been #1, but what I mean is, Irish lads (and this goes for English and Scottish too) don’t date in the same sense of the word like Americans. They don’t take you out for 2 dates to see if they like you or 4 dates before you get to meet their friends. It’s all or nothing and you’re either in a relationship or you’re not (varying degrees, of course). You probably met at a bar, a party, or a sporting event and they’re going to know instantly what type of friendship/relationship/situation you will have.
And ladies, you and I both know what it is if you’re just meeting up at the end of a random night. That’s not dating – in Irish or American terms. #facethefacts
Last week, I had minor outpatient surgery that sparked a few major concerns in my head. I began to question everything from my overall health (I’m healthy…yay!) to my life itself (am I important?) to even bits and pieces of religion (don’t worry this post isn’t going there).
I stressed myself out about all of it to the point that I was in tears if someone even mentioned dying, funerals, pastors, etc. I even started thinking about religion again – looking at options as I knew my personal, fundamental beliefs still didn’t line up with organized thinking.
On Saturday, after my surgery, I was much calmer. Things had gone smoothly and I even asked the doc about my blood as I was convinced my white blood cell count was abnormal. I’m here to report, it’s normal. However, that evening, I went to dinner at my uncle’s house. We were catching up and I was telling him about my recent trip to Cancun and I talked about why Chichen Itza was considered a wonder of the world and about the Mayans. After I finished rambling, he had a coy smile on his face and his girlfriend turned to him and said, well…there’s the big lead in you’ve been waiting for.
He then proceeded to talk about the Mayan prophecy and told me about this show he had been watching on the History Channel called Ancient Aliens (currently available on Netflix instant, if interested!). The premise being that it’s simply impossible for some ancient civilizations to have been purely built by man’s own hand. That they had help from up above. The Mayans in particular have then marked their calendar to not necessarily be the ‘end of the world’ but perhaps just the end as we understand it (though the end could be exactly what we all think).
So, of course I freaked out a little bit and I’ve been obsessed for the past few days, trying to grasp ‘the end’ – whatever it is. I know it sounds dumb and maybe it is, but the only way I can keep my sanity and my fears at bay are to feel mentally prepared and not go around worrying 24/7.
And what exactly am I worried about? In a word – fulfillment. I said to my uncle, “It’s not fair. Everyone else got their 80 years. I only get 27.5? Wtf!” It was the exact fear I had pre-surgery.
So while I agonized over my fear, I came to the conclusion that in order to feel fulfilled I had to let go. I had to live each day, not like it was my last, but like it was a building block to an even better tomorrow. I had to plan my future as I’ve always done and work towards completing my personal goals. I also should not wait to do everything until 2013 or 2014. Maybe live from dollar to dollar one month instead of relying on precise planning and make sure I get to do something that I might have held myself back from otherwise.
And just like that, I felt a little more fulfilled. Not totally full, but on my way. I still quietly worry about December 21, but there’s a lot more I can do between now and then. And if by luck, chance, or hope the Mayans have to make a new calendar, I won’t regret 2012. If anything, I’ll have set the bar higher for 2013.
And here’s a little REM for your Monday:
A lot of people define life’s regrets as ‘could of, should of, would of’. But what about ‘shouldn’t have’?
Last night, at 3:30AM, I was startled from a dream that felt so real it seemed more like a premonition and it kept me awake for the rest of the morning as I laid there thinking…
‘Maybe I shouldn’t have said [blank] to [blank] 6 years ago’
Maybe it’s that time of the year with resolutions flying about that everyone feels the need to start over or maybe somewhere deep in my soul, I really do regret past actions, but why are they popping up now? And how do I deal?
The worst part about my regrettable feelings are that a.) I still think they were justified in the situation and b.) knowing that I had hurt someone else, I apologized 2 years ago for my actions for the simple fact that sometimes it’s better to make amends than to be right.
Is my conscious creeping up on me because I still think I was right? Maybe so, but in my defense and to give you more context I was working for an acquaintance’s parents and after hours (20+) of design and writing work had been completed – they simply rendered my help unwanted without compensation. Old Mags would have let it be, would have allowed someone to walk all over me. But new Mags, just coming into her adulthood, didn’t let it be and I wrote a letter to the parents telling them I felt their actions were rude and disrespectful. The acquaintance let me know that they were ‘disappointed in me’ and that I wasn’t the same.
I let it all go, determined to wipe it from my slate, but in the end he was right. I wasn’t the same. I was growing up and trying to become a strong, independent professional. But all of this still haunted me and apparently still haunts me as this acquaintance was friends with some of my friends and I feared he would spoil my relationship with them.
I know I shouldn’t obsess about what people think and if someone generates an opinion of me based on anything but my character, then they probably aren’t worth my time. But I do obsess and I do fear. What if all my friends from that point in my life are lost because of one action in an effort to defend myself…to not be taken advantage of?
It’s times like these I wish ‘I’m sorry’ was worth a little more.
Sunday’s writing ingredients
1 part old school Vox concept ‘100 words’
1 part random prompt generator (result: sparkly water bottle)
100 words. No less, no more. Mix it all together and see what you get. Have fun & repeat weekly.
‘Excuse me, can you tell me where I can find a sparkly water bottle?’ Louis asked as he tapped the young clerk on the shoulder. The clerk turned around, unimpressed.
‘Why do you need a sparkly water bottle?’ she asked. Louis avoided eye contact and stared down at his shoes. He was slightly embarrassed and felt his leg start to shake nervously. The clerk noticed the involuntary action and slyly smiled, she was going to enjoy this.
‘Soooo, why do you need a sparkly water bottle?’ she repeated.
Louis cleared his throat, ‘Well, isn’t that how you get sparkling water?’